[ A jumble of thoughts ]

I have a lot going on in my world at the moment..... a lot of things are going through my head and through my heart. I thought it might help to put them into words so that i can try to make some sense of it all.

* I am missing Pam. So much you wouldn't believe. I miss our chats over a cup of tea. I miss telling her how things are going. I miss laughing over card making. I miss having her in my life. I have been thinking about going to visit her grave over the weekend but i am not sure if that is a good thing. For one, it make me even sadder and two i no longer really belong to her family. When i split up from my ex i guess i feel like i split up from the family as well. I'm not sure if they would be upset if they found out i had been.

* I haven't done any art in about the last three months. I miss it and perhaps that is why i am finding myself so down. I am itching to do some painting, to get my hands dirty but i know i just don't have the time i need. So maybe tonight i should get my art journal out instead and do some painting in that

* I have tooth ache and have been really sick this past week and weekend. My wisdom tooth is coming out and it is killing. I have this unbelievable fear of the dentist which doesn't help so right now i am sucking on painkillers and hoping it will go away.

* I cant get my parcel. I know its not big in the scheme of things but i just want my parcel! I'm never home - i work and live on my own - so if he is going to try to deliver at those times then i wont be there. Plus he seems to have a habit of first time not giving me my parcel number, which stopped me from being able to get it redirected to my folks. And then when he delivered again yesterday he put the parcel number down but put it down incorrectly! Just lovely!

* I need to do some dish washing - desperately! And some cleaning.

* I'm tired. I have a very busy week between working, gyming 4 times a week, studying and living i don't get much time to relax and find that i am often not getting to bed until 11:30. I am an 8 hours sleep kind of gal. I NEED my sleep. I am going to have to figure something out and quickly.

* I am doing my psychology degree, which i totally am loving, but i am a little worried that i have gotten myself in deeper than i originally thought. I am sure i can manage it, its more the time aspect of it.

* I want to do some baking - must make some time to do this.

* I have been being very good eating wise lately but yesterday and today i am in desperate need of sweet stuff. Chocolate, cheesecake...I'm not really fussed. I just want it and i want it all.

Sorry guys i know this post is a little soppy and winy today but sometimes its good just to get it out. I had this quote emailed to me today and thought it was very true.

"There are times when we may fool ourselves. There are times when we can fool others. But we can never fool our body. It is the most sensitive barometer of our inner world." - Sherrill Sellman

Have a lovely weekend everyone